8-Bit Theater
Episode 187
Episode 187
Second sign of madness: Answering yourself
The Great Compromiser
Date Published Saturday, August 17th, 2002
Previous Comic Episode 186: Everyone Has a Good Side. Sorta.
Next Comic Episode 188: Don't Piss Off the White Mage Either
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There are bigger things to worry about than Fighter and Black Belt's lives, like who is going to win that bet!

Cast AppearingEdit


  • In a forest, on the way to Pravoka
  • Black Mage's conscience


Red MageFour minutes, twenty seconds. Gettin' nervous?
ThiefNope. You?
Red Mage(out of frame) Me neither.
Thief(out of frame) You should be.
Red Mage(out of frame) You should be.
White MageThat's it!
White Mage comes out of hiding.
White MageWhat are you dolts doing! You're just standing around while Black Belt is getting digested!
ThiefI thought he was doing pretty good.
Red MageYeah.
Cut to Black Belt still halfway inside the Creep's mouth.
Black BeltI can't feel my arms.
White MageWell he's not, and he's not, and he could really use your help!
So why don't you settle this insipid bet and start being heroes for once!
Close up on Black Mage, with White Mage's nagging in the background.
White MageBlah blah blah, moral outrage, blah blah blah cold hearted blah blah (...) vile blah blah (etc.)
Cut to Black Mage's conscience.
Black MageSo what's the compromise, guys? I am tired of this inner-monalogue.
Black MageDO IT!
Black Mage(inner-scrutiny) Isn't this an inner dialogue? There is more than one of us, after all.
Black MageWho the hell is that?!
Black MageOh, that's just your inner-scrutiny. He's supposed to double check what you're thinking before you say anything so you don't look like a jack-ass or moron. You usually don't pay any attention to him.
Black MageThat explains so much of my life.
Cut to the forest.
Red MageThe main problem, WM, is that the creep monster is just way too gross for us to get within attacking range of it.
Close up of a Nintendo Power magazine.
Red MageBesides, according to a very reliable source, creeps are vulnerable to fire magic. I've only got Ice and you use White magic.
Back to Black Mage's conscience.
Black MageAnyway, the compromise is a simple one.
Black MageLay it on me.
Black MageYou ignore Fighter, and while we're waiting for him and Black Belt to die, you hit on White Mage!
Black MageI likes me the sound of that compromise!
Black MageDO IT!
Black Mage... I am.
Black MageDO IT.
Black MageWell if you'd shut up about it, I would!
Back to the forest.
White MageMaybe, just maybe, if we all work together, we can defeat this creepin creepy creep.
Black MageSelf-narrating back to... consciousness.
Black Mage comes to.
Red MageAwesome. It's been way more than five minutes.
I won the bet.
ThiefYup. It's a shame you didn't bother to say what we were betting. You win nothing.
Black MageBet's on the what now?
Red MageDarn Thief and his clever loop holes. Darn him.

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