|Date Published||Thursday, February 10th, 2005|
|Previous Comic||Episode 513: Thus Spoke Sardathustra|
|Next Comic||Episode 515: Cold Hearted|
Black Mage stabs Fighter and blames it on the ice mistress.
- Unnamed tundra
|Black Mage||At least the Dark Warriors probably died in the wreck too.|
|Black Mage is silent|
|Black Mage||(with gritted teeth) The pirates.|
I never got the secret to reveal the secret of the mystery of the cursed pirates cave galleon.
|Black Mage||Yes. Tragic. And such a shame it's far too late to start talking about it n--|
|Fighter||They weren't pirates at all.|
(offscreen, with a movie projector and a werewolf) Old Man Withers had set up a complex series of movie projectors, mirrors, smoke machines, and a werewolf to trick us into thinking--
|Black Mage stabs him on the head with a THUNK!|
|Black Mage||The ice is a fickle mistress.|
|Thief||Plus she appears to be a knife wielding maniac.|
|Black Mage||Aren't they all?|
|Thief||Aren't they all what?|
|Black Mage||Women. They're all crazy.|
Look at White Mage and her irrational hatred of me.
|Thief||A) I wouldn't call that crazy so much as expected and B) Can we talk about this after we're dead?|
I can't think of anything I'd like less to talk about in my final moments than the incomprehensible mating rituals of you filthy non-elves.
My plan is nearly complete. The final, most integral step is at hand.
Our very survival now hinges upon Fighter's unique ability to... hrm.
|Red Mage||Oh, murderous ice!|
|Red Mage||When will women-identified personifications learn not to be crazy?!|
|Black Mage||That's what I'm sayin'!|
- Fighter's conclusion of his little mystery is a common cliche in the cartoon, Scooby-Doo. The culprit often uses complicated illusionary objects to fool his/her victims, with Old Man Withers as the common culprit.